Bertie Wooster’s good and deserving Aunt (not his Aunt Agatha, who ate broken bottles and turned into a werewolf at the full moon). A middle aged tough gal who was very modern for the twenties. She is constantly trying to rope Bertie into some insane scheme, usually involving theft or impersonation. She has no scruples when it comes to gambling, but her love for Bertie is clear because many times it is mentioned in the stories that she sent him boxes of goodies while he was at boarding school, and when he was an infant, he swallowed his pacifier and she saved his life (a fact of which she is constantly reminding him). She is, at the very least, hilarious.
A series of telegrams between Dahlia Travers and her nephew, Bertie Wooster:
“Come at once. Love, Travers”
“Perplexed. Explain. Bertie ”
“What on earth is there to be perplexed about, ass? Come at once. Love, Travers ”
“How do you mean come at once? Regards. Bertie ”
“I mean come at once you maddening half-wit. What do you think I meant? Come at once or expect an aunt’s curse by first post tomorrow. Love Travers ”
“When you say come, do you mean come to Brinkley Court? And when you say at once, do you mean at once? Fogged, at a loss. All the best, Bertie ”
“Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes. It doesn’t matter whether you understand or not, you just come at once as I tell you and for heaven’s sake stop this backchat. Do you think I am made of money that I can afford to send you telegrams every ten minutes? Stop being a fathead and come immediately. Love Travers.”
Probably my favorite Dahlia quote ever:
“The girls you’ve been engaged to and have escaped from would reach, if placed end to end, from Piccadilly to Hyde Park Corner. I won’t believe you’re married till I see the bishop and assistant clergy mopping their foreheads and saying, ‘Well, that’s that. We’ve really got the young blighter off at last.”
Books like “The Cat Nappers” and “Stiff Upper Lip, Jeeves” are worth the read for her hijinks alone.
